 |
The wrong and the right whispered but maybe I heard the wrong voice,
Maybe.
Because what was the truth?
What happened in the kitchen near my fridge,
Almost.
But you believed in me.
And you knew that.
I know this.
So I had to not believe the things you thought about,
I wanted to say yes,
I wanted to leave subtitles unseen,
But I couldn't because you believed in me.
I should have realized that vows made through rain drops could not wash away our sins.
(An Anonymous August)
After the ending of Experience is the teacher, Grazi (from Brazil!!)envisioned Grace sending him a story, or
the beginning of one. Here is his response....
Letter 2 - "A Short Story"
Grace, my reply to you is a short story that reminds me of you, the kind
of story that you should be reading because it is similar to your writing. Take it as if it was yours and understand it as
if you were the one who wrote it. As I said before, it's really important that you start to read as a writer. This is my gift
to you...
= = = = = = = =
"And who's going to say that there's a reason for the things done by the heart..."
He
never understood, never forgave her for giving up.
Kat was a kind and sweet only child. She loved life and dedicated
herself to the people she loved. For the first 20 years only her parents, and then for the next 2 years, Mark.
Mark,
a lawyer on the rise, was waiting for a good job opportunity that would allow him to marry Kat. When they least expected it,
the opportunity came. A big law firm from another state offered Mark a junior partnership and the acceptance of this proposal
would provide him a nice life without financial worries.
When he looked for Kat to tell her the good news, he didn't
notice the tears in her eyes. His thoughts were dominated by his professional happiness. He, certain of his decision and trusting
in his feelings, didn't notice the anguish and despair on her face.
Then when the feelings of Kat were finally visible,
he sat down and stared at her, hoping that she would give him an explanation. She told him about the events of the previous
night: the terrible illness that took possession of her father. She demonstrated happiness at the possibility of being married
to him without a delay. But it was necessary that they postpone it a little until she could feel secure and tranquil regarding
her father's health, because only then, knowing that she would be with her family when they most needed her, would she be
able to enjoy real happiness.
Mark, proud as he was, didn't understand her. He was an orphan who never saw himself
attached to anyone, except to Kat, since the first day he met her. He knew that he wanted her and he would never be able to
postpone this love, so that's why such behavior was unacceptable. He only could think about his own unhappiness that this
moment reflected in himself and without hesitation, he gave Kat an ultimatum: Marry him now and enjoy all the things that
would come with this union, or say "Goodbye".
Kat, captive to the incomprehension that the ultimatum caused her, said
nothing, but cried. Mark stood up and left without even looking back.
In the silence of that night, he closed his eyes
and imagined if all the unhappiness that he was feeling would pursue him for the rest of his life. He wanted to come back
to Kat but he convinced himself that everything that seems to represent the happiness of the man, always ended in his ruin.
In the silence of his own words, he felt happy being on his own.
He accepted the job and went away, alone. He felt
good and happy for leaving.
Days went by. The days turned to months and the months to years.
Mark never
came back, never looked for Kat. In all of those years he was dedicated only to his work, but he kept being reminded of her
smile and the dreams that he used to taste when she was around. The emotion that he felt was extraordinary, but the life of
both of them now was how it was destined for them: to be apart.
All the things that he wished he could stop thinking,
he was able to do. But lately, the bitter doubt of Kat's true feelings keep consuming him. It was all he could think about.
He felt that he should look for her.
After 10 years, she would probably be married but he needed to see her just one
more time.
Mark knew that Kat and her family had moved to a coastal city looking for a better and ideal climate for
her father's recovery. He found out a nurse who had once worked for them but because of a family issue, she had to leave the
job. It was 3 years ago and Kat's family still lived in the same place since then.
The front of the house already made
Mark remember Kat - how much of her personality was in those colors, in the garden and in the entrance. He felt his heart
jumping with such an intensity that he almost ran inside when the servant opened the door. While he was waiting in the vestibule,
he was announced. He was received by Kat's mom and notice her surprised expression at seeing him.
Before Mark could
ask to see Kat, her mom excused herself for a minute and left the room. At that moment Mark felt anxiety and humility. All
he wanted was to see her again and ask her to forgive him. He heard the steps coming and then Kat's mom reappeared. She was
holding an envelope and with a calm smile she said: "Kat died last year. She dedicated herself to taking care of me and her
father until the end. She had a peaceful death. She knew that you would come, whether late or not." She gave him the envelope
and left the room, closing the door to the other room.
With his tears hidden between the sadness and the regret, the
anguish and the anxiety, Mark, with his trembling hands, opened the envelope and find a little note that said:
"I was
waiting for you!
Even though we have horizons between us, I feel your presence.
Even though our air is not the
same, I can't find myself desolate because I know that there isn't an explanation for love.
My only refuge is those
moments that we were together. They wake up my imagination: I imagine your face, your voice and your way and I keep in myself
the hope that one day we'll find each other again in a kiss.
Even though we are apart, I can be happy because distant
are our bodies, our faces, our lips.... But never our hearts!
I love you, my love!
Kat
===================
Mark
couldn't keep his tears from falling on his face anymore. After a long reflective moment, he found in himself some strength
to stand up. He walked cautiously toward the door, stopped, and he smiled. How much he loved her. Kat's goodness saw who he
really was and what he really felt. Yes, they lived apart for all those years when everything could have been different. But,
if it wasn't for her self-sacrifice and constancy, maybe he would never have respected, admired and loved her so much as he
did now. And with a last sigh before he went away, he said to himself: "Our hearts won't be apart."
And who's to say
there's a reason for the things done by the heart...
And who's to say that there is no reason...
Grace, keep
writing. Your incredible talent is an inspiration!!!
Love always, August
Once and Again (A)
What I whispered in your ear they would never know the things I said,
Not all of them,
They would never understand
And it would be ours.
A stray fingertip disobeying a mind,
Detention if let get out of hand,
Mind over heart.
I'm glad that in the end the heart won.
The fraud was me.
You knew it that I was a fraud, I warned you didn't I?
But you decided, "it's okay" you weren't afraid to touch,
I was scared to be touched.
The truth could not protect us you had to see that,
Or not, because you always wanted a dream,
And for a while I fell asleep enchanted by a single look a drink,
I let you.
But another look woke us up.
A dream can't be this ending.
It had to be broken up, disrupted by a figure ,our Beowolf.
That had to be the ending of,
A chapter.
I won't forget a look or careless line I --
I read it all again. Again.
|
